Angels around me

 
ok don't watch the video, just listen to it while your read. =)  I'm not a big fan of this song, but it says a lot of what I've been thinking about.

Its no secret that for the past 4 months my life has been turned upside down and inside out. What was up seemed down and what was left was right. I found my life in a place that I never expected let alone planed on.

I think everyone will have at least one of those moments. I had that moment when I was assaulted back in college. I never expected to find myself with that feeling again.

I was in a car accident that left me with two broken feet. No weight on my feet AT ALL. It was a wheelchair for me for the next six weeks. To say it wasn't fun is an understatement. Cory had his own health problems at the time that he had to deal with, so I felt very alone.

Me and my chair. I don't miss it. At. All.

I was anything but alone.  I didn't expect the love and support that I found myself surrounded with. Almost immediately my family was surrounding me. My neighbors and church members came to my aid. For the next six weeks, I was literally never alone. It totally saved me. My family and friends became my angels. They would call me when I was down, visit me, cook for me, clean for me, take care of my kids, bring me flowers, take care of my animals, doing my taxes, celebrating my birthday, even giving money and I could go on and on.  From texting all night to the late night chats to the emergency nacho runs. It was the love and support that I needed. It was the hardest thing that I had dealt with since the assault in college and I was so blessed to have amazing women get me through it.


I wanted to share an experience that I had during all of this. I call it my three miracles. It took place about a month after the accident.

I went to church and put on that brave smile. The kind of smile when you don't want everyone to see the pain you really feel. I was so happy to be at church, but my spirits weren't where I wanted them to be. I had that dark cloud smothering me.

I came home after an hour. My kids stayed at church. I was by myself. The cloud won and I became an emotional wreck. I found myself praying until I was able to get a grip on myself. I prayed and begged my Heavenly Father to send me someone to help me get through the day.

Soon after I prayed the phone rang. It was my friend. She often calls when she is "thinking about me." I put on that fake smile and schmoozed my way through the call.  When I hung up I started to cry again realizing that I had been sent someone to cheer me up, and I blew it off. I begged my Heavenly Father to give me a second chance and to send someone else.

At Physical Therapy. They were increasing my circulation.

Within an hour my dear friend came over. Then  another. Then another.  This went on all afternoon and evening. At one point I had 5 people in my room visiting me. And they all brought goodies.   My sorrows were forgotten and I felt so much love from my friends and neighbors as well from my Heavenly Father. This was my first miracle.

My second miracle that night came when one of my friends came over to help me with my taxes. We had been send a form from the IRS saying we had received a student pell grant. Umm..nope. No grant money here. Since we're required to file it we had to file it. It affected my refund quite a bit. I had just received the go ahead to file an amendment to my taxes. We went online to start the paperwork and we discovered that the IRS had already found and fixed the problem and were going to send me the correct adjusted refund--which was just what I needed to pay our lawyer.

But then I had my third miracle that day. I found out that someone paid the lawyer fee for us.

With my mom. I loved her visits.

Never have I felt so grateful. I knew that even in my darkest days, I had not been forgotten by my Heavenly Father or my friends and neighbors.

I can not say thank you enough. If you thought of me during this time of trial, THANK YOU. There were mornings that I had to pray myself out of bed. Those days I felt the power of prayers said for me.  It kept me going just as much as those lovely ladies.

I LOVE SHOES!

As you know, I have been unable to wear  MY OWN shoes for the past 3 months. All I have been allowed to wear is the big, black boots that were prescribed by my doctor. Apparently, shoe designers were not involved in the process of making these boots attractive and comfortable. If you know a shoe designer, please make them aware of this huge market that is available.

These boots were not enjoyable (granted, they were much more enjoyable then when I was stuck in a wheelchair) and more fashionable, comfortable boots would be greatly appreciated!!
 
 The doctor has finally given me the green light to start wearing shoes. When the date came to finally put on the shoes. I honestly thought that the transition would be easier. I didn't expect how weak my ankles and feet would feel. After all, I have been walking now for a month and I thought that I had made a lot of progress. Ok I'm sure I've made a lot of progress, but it became apparent very quickly that I was not ready for THESE babies. They were fun to look at though.

No. No cute shoes yet. I guess I still need the ultra-supportive-secure-those-ankles-shoes. They look like these. My feel are still so swollen that I can't even fit my feet into regular shoes yet! But hey, its not the boots!!!

So now I am wearing the shoes a few hours of the day while my ankles get stronger. Each day I am able to wear the shoes a little longer.

 Although, I am very slow when I walk and my ankles feel like they could roll at any time. It is so nice to be in shoes that don't feel like cement blocks.  Even if they aren't the cutest shoes out there.

Ben meets the walker

To assist me around the house and when I'm out, I have been using a very helpful tool. A walker. It is great for helping me maintain my balance and stability. It can also double as a chair if I am feeling week in the ankles and need to sit down in a random place (which I totally have).

Ben has become good friends with the "walker". It has become a new place to experience what his body is capable of doing.

Let me explain...if I can.

Sitting comfortably on the handle bars..I seem to remember riding on my sisters bike like this while she drove. Once.


Almost a hand-stand. I was never good at them either. No worries Ben, I still love ya.



Planking of course. Makes me miss my days at Phazes!! Someday I will return for good!!


The dare devil. Show-off.



Just chillin.



Look Mom! One handle!

I love this kind of entertainment.

On a side note, tomorrow I start physical therapy. I am super-duper nervous. I have very little range of motion in my feet/ankles so I KNOW its going to be a slightly painful experience. Woo! Lets do it and get it over with!!! Hopefully, within a month, I will be wearing my own shoes again.

Baby steps

This week was my 6 week checkup with my foot surgeon. I have been looking forward to this visit because of the prospect of beginning to walk again. It has been a frustrating 6 weeks as I have been confined to a wheelchair or my bed. As grateful as I am for all of the help from my neighbors and friends, there is just a sense of accomplishment when you are able to do your own dishes and refill your own water glass.


This is the x-ray right after surgery. You can even see some fractures in it. They removed several bones that were shattered, but I don't know where they were suppose to be or what their names are. But its still interesting to look at.

Update on my scars. I really feel the scars are looking so much better.



Left Foot


Right Foot

Dr.Reber did a great job on my feet. I am very pleased with all of the care that he has given. All of the nurses and care givers at the Foot and Ankle institute in St.George have been great. No complaints at all! When Dr. Reber saw me this week, he looked at the new x-rays, examined my feet and then told me that it was time to start walking. YES! I was praying for those words!! My feet are healing right on schedule. Time to walk!!



Let the walking begin!!!

No joke...this walking thing is HARD. I literally feel like I am taking baby steps around the house. I walk to the kitchen..I take a break. Walk to the living room..whew!..take a break! I have a huge boot on each leg (that I get to wear for at least for another month) and that makes it awkward to move very gracefully. So I plunk along. I really don't care. I am just happy that we have made it this far. :)

And the cast is off!

I have now had my two feet broken for an entire month.

A whole month of no walking or anything else that requires feet.

My left foot has been in a hard cast for the last 3 weeks. Right after the car accident I had reconstructive surgery to make my left foot usable again. When the doctor saw the MRI of the foot, he said to me "your bones are sawdust." Not exactly what you want to hear after a car accident. A month ago, on the 19th, we rear-ended a big truck. My feet were on my seat near the dash and when we hit, the air bags went off. Thus...don't put your feet on the dash!!

Today I got my staples out AND my cast came off. I HATED the cast..it was a nightmare. With the boot, I could at least take it off at night whereas the cast was always on. I have had to had to rely on everyone for just about everything. I spend most of my days on my bed with my feet up. It is difficult to maneuver through my house in a wheelchair. I do the best I can, but really, its easier to just stay on the bed. My pain is much more manageable when my legs are elevated as well.
The kids have been a great help to me. They are always filling up my water and bringing me whatever it is I need. I have also had an amazing support group from my church and from the commonwealth. Thank you ladies! I am so grateful for all of the emails, texts, visits, phone calls, and cards. It has kept me going when it all seems so overwhelming.

I was so excited to get my cast off! I was not prepared for it though, it was freaky!! To have that saw vibrating so close my leg was a little unnerving.

The staples came out next. I was very unprepared for this. I expected a little pull. Well..nope. It was really the most painful experience since they set my feet back at the ER.

But now, I have a lovely boot on my left foot to go along with my boot on the right. I wish I could say they were matching, but as you can see...they are not. But do you know who cares? NOT ME!

Two more weeks till I can start walking! Yeah!! I'm going to have to learn how to do it all over again. But hey, I've done all of this so far so why quit now!

My ten little toes

This is when I could see my ten toes.

I could see my ten toes on my birthday.

I was so happy to have so many friends come over and visit my ten toes as well.


My former scouts came and saw my ten toes as well. They even paper plate danced for me!! (Don't you wish I was your primary chorister! Then you could paper plate dance too!)

Then the doctor wanted to check on my ten toes...warning...don't look if you're squeamish...

He tells me that my toes are so cute! But, the feet and ankles are still broken. Bonus..The plates inside my left foot will grant me a card to bypass the scanners at the airport.


He then puts a hard cast on my left foot and booted up my right. Now I can only see five little toes. But at least I can see my sister's house as well.